Thursday, December 06, 2007

If a post just magically appeared EVERYDAY, without any effort from me, then you'd probably already know about the Doggie Crime Wave of December '07.

We woke up to find my wooden hair brush gnawed to bits. luckily there was plenty of DNA, or actually slobber, to identify the wrongdoer. Soon after we found that said culprit also chewed the side of my built-in wardrobe and munched the clasps off of some innocent and very pretty bras --forcing them into early retirement.

And then, the second worst offense to date, was captured on surveillance cameras. And this crime was PREMEDITATED. Look at the doggie scoping out the luscious snowpeople. You know what he's thinking... yes, he really did run over and PEE on her snowwoman.

happily, posts don't tell everything about every day's events, or else you'd also know about the Duck Assault of November (Pewter is doing fine now). and you would not want to see what remains of the famous Yoga Mat Massacre of last October.

No sentence has been pronounced but let me tell you. sometimes when Farmer barks to be let back in the house i make him wait a millisecond longer than i ought to. which i guess makes us both guilty as charged.

and yes, the dog has loads of chew toys. there's no excuse for that waving mouth of snapping teeth.


sue-donym said...

I woke up to magazine shreds throughtout the kitchen. And a kitchen towel that is now a washcloth.

I too hesitate.

d/b/c/m said...

i love his name!!!

james said...

I would write a comment but I'm too busy laughing.

Sue said...

Bwa ha ha ha ha

I'm glad I'm not the only one with a bad dog.

Geo said...

I've considered sending my doggie to the chain gang for his countless kitchen garbage can crimes—what to do with a repeat offender?

Quel said...

d/b/c/m- we named him "farmer" because he loves to dig in the garden. but "hunter" or "gatherer" would have worked too.

geo- maybe we need to threaten them doggies with three strikes and you're OUT. =)

sues- thanks for understanding the dof woes.

james- you laugh all the time. i love it!